I hope you don't use your cell phone while driving.

Did you know that driving while talking on your cell phone is the equivalent of driving drunk? Your attention is taken away from the road and your reaction time is significantly reduced. You might as well be pulling a DUI. Or a DOC (Driving On Cell-phone) perhaps?

I learned this in traffic school yesterday. We saw a clip from Oprah about what several people did in their cars. One guy used his knees to steer while he reading his Palm Pilot and talking on his Nokia. Another woman peeled an orange while going through her appointment book as her phone rang.

Then Oprah brought on a couple whose darling infant daughter was killed in a car collision. This couple had taken all of the precautions necessary that safe, responsible drivers and parents should—child booster seat, seat belts, careful driving, etc.

What they didn't consider was another motorist who, for a split-second, took his eyes off the road to dial his cell phone.

He ran a red light and sideswiped the couple's car. Their 10-month old daughter was killed instantly.

The mother recounted a particularly traumatic memory of holding her baby's head in her hands, wondering where all the blood was coming from, as she frantically tried to find a pulse.

Several drivers who frequently use their cell phones while driving, including Ms. Orange Peeler, were in the audience as the couple related their tragedy.

Then Ms. Orange Peeler broke into tears.

She reasoned her that behavior was such that she felt her car was her "office." Ms. Orange Peeler was a masseuse and needed to be in constant contact with her clients as she drove from one site to another.

"Why not pull over to take the phone call?" she was asked.

"I can't. I'm too busy."

On any given day, she'd be peeling an orange (or eating whatever food she had) while talking on the phone AND driving.

The clip showed her frequently taking her eyes off the road for multiple split-second periods.

And that's all it takes for an accident. A split-second.

This was one of the major topics in this traffic school. Pizza 4U Great Comedians Traffic School it was called. Comedians are now running traffic schools. What a great country we live in.
We got free pizza during this class. After that, we saw a clip on a woman who was putting on her make-up while driving. A dash of mascara here, a smear of lipstick here.

The instructor told us a story where another woman was using an eyelash curler in her car. She only applied her make-up at stop signs because it was safer. So the thought.

Then she was hit from behind by another car.

Her eyelash curler went straight up into her eye socket. Mighty painful!

"Why not put on your make-up at home or in the office?" she was asked.

"I can't. I'm too busy."

See a pattern in these incidents?

All it takes is a split-second of distraction to get into an accident. Distractions often come in the form of trying to combine multiple tasks at once because people are too busy, like shampooing AND conditioning your hair. Some tasks just can't be done together.

If God wanted you to shampoo and condition your hair at the same time, He would have created a Shampoo/Conditioner In One.

Oh wait, bad example. Um. Let's say it's like patting your head while rubbing your tummy at the same time. Can't be done.

If God wanted you to pat your head while rubbing your tummy at the same time, He would have given you the reflexes of a circus monkey.

Okay, another bad analogy. I suck. But I'm not talking about analogies here. I'm talking about the cause of car accidents.

So why do we still go ahead and combine impossible tasks?

Because we're too busy.

And why do we do that?

Because our society is getting too focused on work. On productivity.

Technology is making our lives more busy, not less (like some technology pundits once believed). Work is controlling our lives. We are striving to become more efficient rather than more safe or happy.

Sadly, I'm the perfect example of the result of such a society. Hi, my name is Mike and I'm a workaholic.

I microwave my food because I don't want to "waste" precious time in cooking it. I use a cell phone because I don't want to "waste" precious time finding a phone. I bring my clothes to a dry cleaner because I don't want to "waste" precious time washing and ironing them myself.

I am shackled by the need to maximize my productivity because time is the most important commodity I have. I am the poster child for the Workaholic Generation.

And I realize this and know that it is slowing nurturing an ulcer in my belly.

Thus my move to California. Talk of a slower, more easygoing lifestyle here attracted me. I knew I had to learn how to slow down and enjoy life before it was over.

Before I end up peeling an orange in my car while talking on the cell phone and colliding into another car because, for a split-second, I looked away from the street.

. . .

Do you ever use your cellphone while driving?