The Lens of Life: It’s All About Perceptions

The glass is not half full nor half empty. The glass has water in it, filled approximately to the middle. Or: the glass has equal portions of gas and liquid content within its cylindrical interior. Or: the glass is entirely full of air and water. Or… you get the point.

It’s all about perception. Life isn’t how it is; it’s how you see it.

If you see the world as a cold, harsh place, then for you — the world is indeed, cold and harsh. Sucks for you.

If you see the world as a fun & challenging place, then for you, the world is fun & challenging. Rock on.

Here’s a metaphor I use: my life as a series of lenses. My perception of life is influenced by the lenses through which I view it. Every lens is tainted by the grime of experience. In fact, each lens was created by the summary of past experience, heated in a cauldron of emotional responses and cognitive rationalizations.

It is impossible to be truly objective, unless you’re a robot or Vulcan. But as a human, it’s impossible because of the construction of our brains. Studies have shown that memories are forged through a furnace of emotion, for better or worse. Interestingly enough, emotional memories are retained better than those devoid of emotions.

Think about your childhood. Which memories are most vivid? Those that are most painful or happy, right? How about the 303rd bath you ever took? Why don’t you remember that one? Because it was mundane and relatively low on emotional content.

Over time, these emotional memories, mixed with your genetic predispositions (you can thank your Mom & Dad for that) and environmental factors (education, cultural upbringing, friends & family, religion, social status, etc) shaped your unconscious view on life. Together, this mixture hardened into a lens through which you now view your life.

Lenses are limiting. They limit how far you can see and what you can see. This is not a bad thing. It is a natural ability that offers you protection, your defense mechanism, if you will. Prejudices, assumptions, and beliefs all come from your lenses. Some limitations can be hurtful, some can be helpful, though the degrees of such are subjective.

There isn’t just one lens either. There are many, shaped through various phases of life. You may have your family lens, your work lens, your school lens, etc. The number of lenses depends on the number of wholly different experiences you’ve have and your awareness of, and synthesis of, those life phases. Living in a foreign country often splinters one’s world view and creates a new lens, for instance.

Mine include my family lens, my Chinese American lens, my New Yorker lens, my Californian lens, my traveler lens, my spiritual lens, my anthropological & sociological lens, my self-reflective lens, my self-improvement lens, my entrepreneurial lens, my technology-oriented lens, etc. There are many more I’m not aware of too, I’m sure.

As you can see, your lenses don’t map not just to your phases of life, but to the different ways you view your identity as well. And, of course, they all overlap quite a bit.

There are no right or wrong lenses, better or worse lenses, just degrees of helpfulness in society and influence on your actions. Some lenses may enable you to be a highly-successful person in some situations, but horribly inept in others. Others lenses may make you terribly miserable in some situations and protect you from harm in others.

However, you aren’t stuck with a particular lens. You can change your view, as long as you cognitively try. It just takes effort. Sometimes tremendous effort. But it is impossible for everyone.

How? For some, it’s simply a matter of being aware of your different lenses. For others, supportive friends & family can help. And for others, professional advice and help is required.

I’m sure you’ve met people who’ve changed the main lens through which they view life. They may be religious converts or political converts. They may be so excited about their new view that they won’t shut up about it. Such a person has had a major epiphany (which is generally how a major change in lens view affects a person) and is naturally excited about it, though not all changes are so grand.

Want to try a quick lens switch exercise? Imaging yourself as a soccer player. You’re on the field. You can feel the brisk chill of the afternoon air. The smell of freshly-cut grass is all around you. A trickle of sweat is at the corner of your eye. Other players are yelling at each other. The ball is being kicked around. You’re keeping an eye on the ball, your teammates, and your opponents. Your mind is flipping back and forth from anticipating where the ball will be and how other players are reacting to the ball. Your legs are also getting tired and there’s a side stitch in your gut. And damn, you’re thirsty.

Now imagine yourself as the coach of that team. You’re standing on the side of the field. Someone’s brewing coffee besides you. Your players are yelling, the other team is yelling, and the fans are yelling behind you. You’re keenly watching your players run up and down the field, positioning themselves around the ball. At the same time, you’re also watching the opponents and analyzing their positions in relation to your team’s. Your goalie looks tired and you’re worried about a potential goal. Another player is being overly aggressive and you’re concerned about the referee calling a penalty. Two of the opposing players are really strong and fast, so you’re trying to make sure your team doesn’t let them through your defense. Your voice is sore from yelling commands and encouragement to your team.

In the first lens, you had the view of an individual contributor on a team. You had to be conscious of your own actions as they related to others, while balancing your fatigue and condition.

In the second lens, you had the view of a supervisor of a team. You had to have a gestalt of the entire game and offer not only direction, but encouragement as their confidence rose and shrank.

That is a small example of a lens switch. Both views are totally correct while being entirely different. All of us switch like that daily, maybe even hourly.

Now consider this: what if you’re able to combine lenses? Or switch between both in any given situation? What if you, as a soccer player, also considered the game from the coach’s point of view? That’s what a team captain often does. Viewing the game through both lenses would put you on a path for advancement and leadership in this situation.

Combining lenses often gives offers such power and opportunity. It opens your mind to other views you may not have otherwise considered. It keeps your mind amiable to new ideas and new contexts.

You know the saying, “Never judge a person until you’ve walked a mile in his shoes”? Same principle applies here. When you’re viewing your situation through another lens, you’re revising the natural limitations of what you perceive. While you’re probably replacing them with the limitations of another lens, you’re still expanding your previous boundaries. And that’s the power of changing & combining lenses.

Of course, this is all an opinion formed through my own lens. This is how I perceive my life. You may perceive it differently and prefer to keep your current world view. In which case, I can’t help but think: sucks for you.