I, like many Asian Americans I know, turned lactose intolerant a few years ago. Right around the age of 30. And it totally sucked ass.

No more Cold Stones and Ben & Jerrys. Goodbye Pizookies. Hello estrogen-laden soy milk. (Reduced sex drive what??)

To be fair, this isn't a case just for Asian Americans. A lot of people are lactose intolerant. It affects all ethnicities and cultures. The commonly cited number is 70-75% of the world's population. That's a heck of a lot of people!

In fact, it's perfectly natural to be lactose intolerant. Lactase, the enzyme that breaks down lactose in our small intense, is gradually reduced as we get older. This reduction begins right after weaning and is practically all gone by adulthood. Bummer.

So if this is natural, why would I want to be able to drink milk? I'll give you three reasons: Cold Stones, Ben & Jerrys, and Pizookies. I have a thing for sweets, what can I say?

My path to lactose intolerance reduction began innocently. One day, a friend casually mentioned to me that yogurt contains live bacteria that aids in lactose digestion. Hmm, I thought. So I did some research and found that:

Yogurt contains probiotics - microbial organisms that are naturally present in our digestive tracts. They are known as "friendly" bacteria. And more specifically, yogurt contains a particular kind of probiotics called acidophilus. If you want to get even more specific, it's Lactobacillus acidophilus.

When yogurt is consumed, bile acids disrupt the cell wall of the bacteria in yogurt. This releases the enzyme beta-galactosidase (related to lactase) into the intestines, where it can enhance lactose digestion.

Not any yogurt will do, however. It must contain live active bacteria. Fortunately, yogurt labels clearly list whether or not they have live active bacteria - which sounds gross, I know, but it's really a good thing. Remember, they are "friendly" bacteria!

With that in mind, I decided to try a very unscientific experiment:

  1. Eat yogurt every day for 2-3 weeks
  2. Drink a glass of milk at the end of each week

The results?

Week 1

Lactose intolerance still there. And how. I admit, I didn't drink a full glass of milk. But the effects were the same. I shall spare you the details.

Week 2

Lactose intolerance is going away. Still a bit of its consequences, but a full glass of milk doesn't have the, uh, intense adverse effects it once did. Experiment is working!

Week 3

Lactose intolerance… gone! Holy crap! (Or lack thereof.) Hello ice cream, goodbye soy milk! This is a glorious milestone, simply glorious.

I've been drinking milk semi-regularly since then, with no problems at all. Well, perhaps I've been a might bit gassy, but hopefully that will go away in a few more weeks. My friends all sure hope so. Fut.

I can hardly say this experiment is reliable or conclusive. What worked for me may not work for you - just like acidophilus works for some, but not others. If you want to try this, consult your doctor or nutritionist first. After all, maybe humans are lactose intolerant for a reason. (And if you are allergic to milk, that's a very different condition.)

Now pardon me while I enjoy this cup o' Cold Stone ice cream. Mmmm!