Mike Lee.org - Weekly Random Rambles, Musings & Writings of Mike Lee

Terror


What Would You Do If the World Was Full of Zombies?

November 30th, 2008
By Mike Lee

I think we can all agree that sometimes, it's important to prepare for the worst. Part of any good preparation plan includes scenario building. From those various scenarios can come any number of solutions.

So it was with this judicious safety research in mind that my cousins and I embarked on the critical scenario building of what we'd do if the world was full of zombies. Such are the in-depth discussions that brew out of a belly full of Thanksgiving turkey.
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Turtle Snack Attack

October 26th, 2008
By Mike Lee

"Awww, what a cute little turtle!" he marveled. The baby turtle, about the size of his thumb's fingernail, wiggled on his finger. Its tiny legs struggled to climb and move somewhere.

"It's so cute it looks almost good to eat! Hmm… maybe…"

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The Little Lemur

October 19th, 2008
By Mike Lee

It was a fine sunny day when I took a stroll through the zoo with my stuffed puppy. Because, c'mon, who wouldn't want to stroll through the zoo with their stuffed puppy?

I passed by the lemur cage and heard a rattle. A lemur was staring up at me with wide, round eyes.

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Security Scare at the Airport

September 14th, 2008
By Mike Lee

So here's how it went down:

I'm on a Delta Song flight from JFK to SFO. The plane is mostly packed. I'm towards the rear. Although it's around dinner time, the lights are dimmed, and most of the passengers are asleep.

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Daughter

November 5th, 2006
By Mike Lee

"Doctor! Doctor!"

A torrent of tiny bangs shuddered the door. Zach leaned up and tried to focus on the clock. 3:00AM.

"Doctor! Doctor!"

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A College Horror Story

October 29th, 2006
By Mike Lee

"You know how you get an automatic A if one of your roommates commits suicide?"

Sandy frowned. "That's morbid, Sally. Don't say that."

"You're the one who'd need it." Sally snapped her gum. "Didn't you get a D in your last midterm?"

"No… an F…"

"See!"

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One Late Night in the Office

October 31st, 2004
By Mike Lee

The lights usually blink off at 10:00pm in the office. This is to conserve energy. To turn them back on, you have to get up from your desk and flip the switch manually.

I know this because I work late on occasion. Well, more than on occasion; perhaps fairly often. Blame it on workaholic tendencies and an industry that expects 80+ hour work weeks. My hours have since gotten better, but that's another story for another time.

Tonight, I want to tell you about a peculiar night I had last month.

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Unidentified Flying Object

April 11th, 2004
By Mike Lee

Please help me explain this. I'm sure there's a perfectly reasonable and realistic explanation for it.

On Friday night, April 9th, 2004, at about 11:17pm PST, I was traveling northbound on the US-101. I was right next to the San Francisco International Airport (SFO) and was about to make my way to the US-380 entrance.

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Dealing with Paranoia

February 1st, 2004
By Mike Lee

NOTE: This is a humor article and not a serious resource on how to deal with paranoia. If you're looking for real information, you can find some at Wikipedia, Schizophrenia.com, MindDisorders.com, or Mental Health Care. Take care.

Today's self-help topic: Dealing with Paranoia.

It's not everyday that you hear a grown man in the bathroom say (I really heard someone say this):

"Please go outside. I cannot make pee pee while you stand there."

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The Texas Chainsaw Massacre

November 2nd, 2003
By Mike Lee

Blood and gore isn't the kind of thing that scares me in movies. Ghosts are, but blood and guts, nah.

So when we walked into the theater on a bright Sunday afternoon to watch The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, I was smiling. When I'm in a good mood, I like scary movies. And that day, I was in a good mood.

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