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The Art of Digital Zen

June 1st, 2008
By Mike Lee

Zen is a school of thought, a state of being. A way of thinking. Traditionally, it is a school of Mahayana Buddhism known for emphasizing an acceptance of the present, embracing spontaneous action, and emancipating the self-conscious & judgmental thinking.

For better or worse, its meaning has evolved as other schools of thought have adopted and interpreted it. In the Mike Lee School of Thought, I merely make a contemporary addition to the traditional definition: excising physical belongings and converting them to a non-corporeal form, namely, the digital format. In my geeky way, this is what I call Digital Zen.

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The Transformers

July 22nd, 2007
By Mike Lee
"The Transformers, more than meets the eye.
Autobots wage their battle to destroy the evil forces of the Decepticons.
The Transformers, robots in disguise.
The Transformers, more than meets the eye.
The Transformers!"
- Transformers Cartoon Theme Song

I had my own universe once. A universe where all of my toys existed together and battled one another. Autobots and G.I. Joe troops defended against Decepticons, Cobra, Battle Beasts, M.U.S.C.L.E.s, and Darth Vader & the Empire's troops.

Unfortunately, I didn't have a lot of Japanese toys; otherwise I would've mixed Robotech and Gundam in there too. I did have Voltron though. Go Voltron!

(Warning: High Geek Content Ahead.)

(As if you didn't already guess that.)

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Tender Loving Car

September 3rd, 2006
By Mike Lee

It was like my car was taking a golden shower on my finger. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

The day was crisp. Birds were announcing the arrival of the sun. Early morning joggers were taking to the streets. I awoke from some surreal dream and looked at the clock.

"It's Sunday," I thought to myself. "Sweet."

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An Email Soap Opera

July 23rd, 2006
By Mike Lee
Date: June 2
To: Mike Lee
From: Friend in IT
Subject: [fwd] [re] [fwd] [re] [fwd] [re] I can still smell you...

hey mike, here's the full thread. I reordered it so it's in chronological order. it's funny as hell. it's like a friggin soap opera. don't these people know that my job is to monitor work emails? they shouldn't be sending crap like this at work. but what the hell. makes my job more fun. heh. enjoy!

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A Night under the Stars

October 20th, 2005
By Mike Lee

This is based on a true story. The names have been changed to protect the innocent. The emails have mostly been kept the same so we can laugh at them.

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Please, Touch My Ass Some Mo'

May 16th, 2004
By Mike Lee

The line to the show was excruciatingly long. But that's to be expected when you're waiting to see Honda's ASIMO, a four-foot walking humanoid robot.

After standing an hour on the crowded line, we took our seats and eagerly awaited the show.

"Um, excuse me."

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Dealing with Paranoia

February 1st, 2004
By Mike Lee

NOTE: This is a humor article and not a serious resource on how to deal with paranoia. If you're looking for real information, you can find some at Wikipedia, Schizophrenia.com, MindDisorders.com, or Mental Health Care. Take care.

Today's self-help topic: Dealing with Paranoia.

It's not everyday that you hear a grown man in the bathroom say (I really heard someone say this):

"Please go outside. I cannot make pee pee while you stand there."

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iPod

July 27th, 2003
By Mike Lee

I finally got one! An iPod! Along with a Belkin Tunecast and an XtremeMac Car Charger. And you know what?

I give them all a thumbs down.

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Spam

June 16th, 2002
By Mike Lee

"Horny Farm Animals Want You!"

Apparently, there's a herd of lonely but sexually frustrated farm animals out there that have learned how to send emails. Smart horny buggers, aren't they? They've taken photos of themselves and want you to see.

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Chain of Communication

February 3rd, 2002
By Mike Lee

You know what's ruder than someone who stabs your eye with sweaty unshorn armpit hairs?

Someone who makes you wait while they finish an email, online chat or phone call.

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