Leslie Magic
September 28th, 2008"Hey stupidhead, that's my cup of latte!" Leslie shouts.
The guy looks down at the latte, snorts, and takes a gulp. "I don't see your name on it," he huffs. Fuming, Leslie starts to wave her hands through the air.
Supernatural
Archived Entries from this Category
Gemini's Horoscope
March 25th, 2007A March 7th issue of The Onion was lying on the kitchen table next to a pile of newspapers. Gemini, whose hippie parents obviously named her during a drug-induced haze of sensibility, flipped through the paper. She sipped her coffee and turned to the horoscopes.
"Ah, Gemini," she said to herself. Which, obviously, was her horoscope. Damn those hippie parents.
Her horoscope read:
In a tragic twist of fate, you'll be overwhelmed this week by both a sense of fear and a pack of wolves.
Daughter
November 5th, 2006"Doctor! Doctor!"
A torrent of tiny bangs shuddered the door. Zach leaned up and tried to focus on the clock. 3:00AM.
"Doctor! Doctor!"
A College Horror Story
October 29th, 2006"You know how you get an automatic A if one of your roommates commits suicide?"
Sandy frowned. "That's morbid, Sally. Don't say that."
"You're the one who'd need it." Sally snapped her gum. "Didn't you get a D in your last midterm?"
"No… an F…"
"See!"
Woofer
April 30th, 2006Woofer, the 170 pound Irish Wolfhound, backed his new owners to the couch and to their amazement, began speaking.
"Listen folks, this is how it's going to be…"
The Hulk
April 16th, 2006"Eat your brussel sprouts, Jimmy," his mother said. "They'll make you grow big and strong, just like the Hulk."
Jimmy frowned and pecked his brussel sprouts. He didn't like how they tasted, but he knew his mother was right. Mother was always right.
An Alien Feeding Ritual
October 2nd, 2005"It was horrible, my Lord, simply horrible." *
"Explain."
Research Lead Nu'tauk cleared his ebrilleum and shook his vishaft. He turned to the holoscreen and brought up the holovid.
Unidentified Flying Object
April 11th, 2004Please help me explain this. I'm sure there's a perfectly reasonable and realistic explanation for it.
On Friday night, April 9th, 2004, at about 11:17pm PST, I was traveling northbound on the US-101. I was right next to the San Francisco International Airport (SFO) and was about to make my way to the US-380 entrance.
Dealing with Paranoia
February 1st, 2004NOTE: This is a humor article and not a serious resource on how to deal with paranoia. If you're looking for real information, you can find some at Wikipedia, Schizophrenia.com, MindDisorders.com, or Mental Health Care. Take care.
Today's self-help topic: Dealing with Paranoia.
It's not everyday that you hear a grown man in the bathroom say (I really heard someone say this):
"Please go outside. I cannot make pee pee while you stand there."
What Kind of Superpower Would You Want?
November 9th, 2003What kind of superpower would you want? Say you could have any superpower you could think of. You could fly or walk through walls or read minds.
